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Aug. 3rd, 2008 01:16 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
terrypurple73It's way too late to be up, especially considering the fact that I want to get up in the morning for church at Pax, but here I am. I stayed up too late tonight watching television, which is unusual for me, but oh well. This is what I do on vacation, I guess.
I'm home in the wonders of Minnesota for a long weekend, and I'm really glad to be here. My cousin got married yesterday, and while it was fun to celebrate for her, we didn't get to say more than a few words to each other at the reception or the brunch this morning. Leslie was definitely the closest cousin I had growing up (many of you have met her when she came to HS parties and whatnot), and we drifted into different lives a long time ago- probably when we did that college thing. Our lives quit looking the same, and even when they got on similar paths a few years later, we never really found our way back to each other. I know we'll be in each other's lives forever, though, so even though it makes me kind of sad with this drifting apart, I know that in a matter of years, our lives will come together again, once we're a little more settled and more active in the family get-togethers. We'll form grown-up friendships, I think, and they'll be different from the pre-adolescent ones we had for years, but hopefully will be just as hilarious and full of eye-rolling. It's nice to have that faith in future relationships.
I'm working on having that faith in other long-term friendships as well. It seems so many of us are still in very different places (geographically or otherwise) from each other, and we have been for a few years now. But hey now, it looks like many of us are setting up lives within these places and decisions, and oh wait, we don't all have four-year-plans in the dorms anymore, and we're left with trying to make this work from a distance. Only for real, not just this temporary thing anymore. There's not as much of the see-you-at-Christmas-and-on-breaks thing, and there's less of the we'll-all-be-back-in-Omaha-for-SOMETHING-right thing. There's more of the holy-hell-my-life-is-somewhere-else-now thing, and even more of the we-have-to-put-real-effort-into-these-friendships-or-at-least-more-active-trust-that-we'll-be-all-right thing. It's an adjustment that I made quickly with some friends, and that I'm scared to make with others. I've even been in Colorado long enough that I'm starting to make the transition with friends out there. I never had to put in effort with some of these people before, because they just LIVED WITH ME. And now they don't, or they haven't for a few years, and what's still there of our relationship? I like coming back to the friendships where we had great times, but we also still care about each other's present. I've got a little Holden Caulfield in me when I say that I don't want friendships where we just say, "Oh, I'm good- how about you?" I guess I have to make myself say more than that, or else I have to trust, like with Leslie, that this will be fine, even if it feels fake in the now.
I feel a bit rambley in all this, but it's well past my bedtime. Oh well.
I got together with Annette and Shannon tonight, and we decided that it would be too stalkerish to go over to Strampe's house to say hello to her. But it wouldn't be too stalkerish to sit at the coffee shop near her house that she goes to all the time, and just stay there for three hours in case maybe she shows up because she has nothing better to do over her dinner hour on a Saturday night. So we sat there and discussed abortion, and why none of us will be nuns, and how no party at Miller Park can ever top the May Day party of 1997. I'm sorry that most of you weren't there, because it was awesome.
Also awesome will be seeing Mana this weekend, and spending some more time with my family. Cathy and I have hung out, and we have so much fun together when we feel like it. We took the dance floor by storm on Friday night, and the only person potentially cooler than us was our 14-year-old second-cousin who played ACDC on the drums.
Rock on.
I'm home in the wonders of Minnesota for a long weekend, and I'm really glad to be here. My cousin got married yesterday, and while it was fun to celebrate for her, we didn't get to say more than a few words to each other at the reception or the brunch this morning. Leslie was definitely the closest cousin I had growing up (many of you have met her when she came to HS parties and whatnot), and we drifted into different lives a long time ago- probably when we did that college thing. Our lives quit looking the same, and even when they got on similar paths a few years later, we never really found our way back to each other. I know we'll be in each other's lives forever, though, so even though it makes me kind of sad with this drifting apart, I know that in a matter of years, our lives will come together again, once we're a little more settled and more active in the family get-togethers. We'll form grown-up friendships, I think, and they'll be different from the pre-adolescent ones we had for years, but hopefully will be just as hilarious and full of eye-rolling. It's nice to have that faith in future relationships.
I'm working on having that faith in other long-term friendships as well. It seems so many of us are still in very different places (geographically or otherwise) from each other, and we have been for a few years now. But hey now, it looks like many of us are setting up lives within these places and decisions, and oh wait, we don't all have four-year-plans in the dorms anymore, and we're left with trying to make this work from a distance. Only for real, not just this temporary thing anymore. There's not as much of the see-you-at-Christmas-and-on-breaks thing, and there's less of the we'll-all-be-back-in-Omaha-for-SOMETHING-right thing. There's more of the holy-hell-my-life-is-somewhere-else-now thing, and even more of the we-have-to-put-real-effort-into-these-friendships-or-at-least-more-active-trust-that-we'll-be-all-right thing. It's an adjustment that I made quickly with some friends, and that I'm scared to make with others. I've even been in Colorado long enough that I'm starting to make the transition with friends out there. I never had to put in effort with some of these people before, because they just LIVED WITH ME. And now they don't, or they haven't for a few years, and what's still there of our relationship? I like coming back to the friendships where we had great times, but we also still care about each other's present. I've got a little Holden Caulfield in me when I say that I don't want friendships where we just say, "Oh, I'm good- how about you?" I guess I have to make myself say more than that, or else I have to trust, like with Leslie, that this will be fine, even if it feels fake in the now.
I feel a bit rambley in all this, but it's well past my bedtime. Oh well.
I got together with Annette and Shannon tonight, and we decided that it would be too stalkerish to go over to Strampe's house to say hello to her. But it wouldn't be too stalkerish to sit at the coffee shop near her house that she goes to all the time, and just stay there for three hours in case maybe she shows up because she has nothing better to do over her dinner hour on a Saturday night. So we sat there and discussed abortion, and why none of us will be nuns, and how no party at Miller Park can ever top the May Day party of 1997. I'm sorry that most of you weren't there, because it was awesome.
Also awesome will be seeing Mana this weekend, and spending some more time with my family. Cathy and I have hung out, and we have so much fun together when we feel like it. We took the dance floor by storm on Friday night, and the only person potentially cooler than us was our 14-year-old second-cousin who played ACDC on the drums.
Rock on.
