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Jan. 3rd, 2006 05:44 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
terrypurple73Most days, I love my job and all the bizarre parts that it entails. Tonight I am reminded of that outrageous epiphany I had maybe a month ago: When life beyond work is going well, then work goes well. When life beyond work is stressful, so is work.
I'm just tired today, that's all. I didn't get a break between my shifts today (well, I did, I just spent it grocery shopping, showering, bus-pass buying, and making a couple necessary phone calls), so I was exhausted by the time I showed up here at Fr. Ed Judy House. And I might have stayed up talking to Shannon until 1:00 this morning, so my sleep level is less than needed. At least it was good talking with her. We're working on our plan to save the world, and it never stops amazing me how she and I are able to connect every aspect of our lives- from the very micro parts to the very macro parts. They're all interconnected, and Shannon helps me see that and apply strategies from each to the other. Who knew that love life situations are connected to global violence situations in such similar ways? Even if I knew this, it's good to re-recognize it.
The weekend in Kansas was great, though draining. Being together as (11 of our 12) CVV Community felt wonderful, especially with the opportunity to celebrate Tiana's wedding. Some love life situations presented themselves in ways that were challenging at points, but mostly, the weekend was a lot of fun and energizing (though yes, in a draining way). I just love those re-connections, those hugs that make the distance easier to return to, the conversations that hold you in their presence, the simple time spent together that breathes sighs of relief on its own. .... Luckily, most of us will see each other again in two months, at Jake and Siobhann's wedding. Who knows, after that.
But here I am at work, not feeling like working, yet trying to seem productive. But I just don't feel like leaving the office to go toward the masses of yelling (for no reason) children. I don't feel with it enough tonight to put up the boundaries that need to be put up.
I'm just tired today, that's all. I didn't get a break between my shifts today (well, I did, I just spent it grocery shopping, showering, bus-pass buying, and making a couple necessary phone calls), so I was exhausted by the time I showed up here at Fr. Ed Judy House. And I might have stayed up talking to Shannon until 1:00 this morning, so my sleep level is less than needed. At least it was good talking with her. We're working on our plan to save the world, and it never stops amazing me how she and I are able to connect every aspect of our lives- from the very micro parts to the very macro parts. They're all interconnected, and Shannon helps me see that and apply strategies from each to the other. Who knew that love life situations are connected to global violence situations in such similar ways? Even if I knew this, it's good to re-recognize it.
The weekend in Kansas was great, though draining. Being together as (11 of our 12) CVV Community felt wonderful, especially with the opportunity to celebrate Tiana's wedding. Some love life situations presented themselves in ways that were challenging at points, but mostly, the weekend was a lot of fun and energizing (though yes, in a draining way). I just love those re-connections, those hugs that make the distance easier to return to, the conversations that hold you in their presence, the simple time spent together that breathes sighs of relief on its own. .... Luckily, most of us will see each other again in two months, at Jake and Siobhann's wedding. Who knows, after that.
But here I am at work, not feeling like working, yet trying to seem productive. But I just don't feel like leaving the office to go toward the masses of yelling (for no reason) children. I don't feel with it enough tonight to put up the boundaries that need to be put up.
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Date: 2006-01-04 04:08 am (UTC)I'm exhausted.
And in response to "love life situations" presenting themselves in challenging ways....I would have to say that if I had to see someone I loved and their significant other doing wedding-y stuff(dancing mainly), I probably would feel crushed all over again. Something about watching someone you want dance with someone else....maybe because it's so metaphorical.
I'm probably not making any sense though...it's the exhaustion. I'll try to call you soon.
Love you, hate you, miss you,
~Victoria
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Date: 2006-01-04 07:09 pm (UTC)Some days, I feel like my life is my work (or my work is my life), too. As much as I want my job to show who I am and what I care about, there are other parts of me too, which get shoved aside when I need to focus on work.
Last night, one five year old chased another down the hallway, and the first ran into her room. The second kept chasing, including putting his hand into her doorway, and her "had to shut the door on his hand." Clearly, HAD to. Oh, adventures!
I'm so glad you understand things.
love and hatred and missing too,
~Therrt
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Date: 2006-01-04 04:49 am (UTC)Katie
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Date: 2006-01-04 06:54 am (UTC)